PRESS ARTICLES

"Glam Shrink "

Source: Sindhian - 2006

Summary: Clinical psychologist, Varkha Chulani dispels some myths to Maya Raaj

ARTICLE

Very long ago, people were afraid of anything that spelt ‘Psychology’. Only the insane thought of consulting one. Becoming one – did not quite cut it. Along the years, as life got tougher, the problems larger, stress levels overflowing, people somehow broached the subject, no longer mentioned it in whispers, and openly started tackling their issues with the help of the educated lot – ‘Psychologists’.

When Rupa & Co added Varkha Chulani, a clinical psychologist, to their long list of authors, under their new publishing sister concern – Alchemy, they knew exactly how far the book’s reach in the field would be. Today, Varkha Chulani is not only a Psychologist of repute but comes from a formidable background, of being trained in Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) at the Albert Ellis Institute, New York City. Every Newspaper, every radio station, every magazine, was carrying on about her achievements. And rightly so! The timing is perfect. People are more than ready to listen, evaluate and focus bettering their lives today.

A meeting with the 5 feet tall, spunky and very articulate Doctor put a lot of misconceptions to rest. Just watching her in the audience at a book-reading did not quite completely satisfy my curiosity. Nor did perusing through her new book For The Thinking Woman. Her answering queries and dispelling myths – in the flesh – did it! What Varkha has done in her book, with immense honesty and clarity is address some very common feminine concerns. She continues to teach women to unconditionally accept themselves.

How did Varkha actually get to this stage where she could counsel other people?
Varkha’s journey-from her educative years to finally becoming a practicing clinical psychologist reads like the typical story of a middle child, rearing its head, above all adversity, longing to be seen and heard. It must have been difficult to be the naughtier one between twins, and have the other-more famous and recognized.

Nonetheless, Varkha carried on. Letting marriage wait, and finally found her calling. Absolutely large – hearted, devoid of so-called sibling rivalry, Varkha always stood her own, owing to the fact that her parents always encouraged her to think for herself. A proud daughter of a man who actually went back to college at age 50. an inspiration indeed! But Varkha has to add that she had her share of disagreements with her father, stemming from the fact that at times he was too rigid and intellectually fascist.

Academically, Varkha goes on to add that she was not aiming at anything till her final year at Mithibai College. (She surprised herself by attaining a cool 89% in her Psychology paper in SNDT). That was the turning point! Sporty and focused and completely non-academic, Varkha by her own admission accepts that she was indeed a late-bloomer. Destiny had chosen Varkha when her friend put her name down for Psychology instead of Sociology. A National Merit Scholarship holder, Varkha danced her way through College, being a part of the Shiamak Davar group.

Kalina University was next and Varkha found herself doing her Masters. The second turning point in her life was when in her 2nd year she meet this amazing professor Kishore Phadke, a Ssupervisor and a Fellow at the Albert Ellis Institute of New York. Amazingly, and in spite of never having visited America, he had a license to teach other Psychologists. The seven-day workshop changed her entire life. Today she is the 2nd person in the whole of Asia to be a fellow Associate. Later when she needed to do her advanced fellowship, she wrote to Albert Ellis himself, who is to – Cognitive Behavioral Therapy what Freud was to Psycho-Analysis. She struck gold with that, since Albert Ellis has made it possible for her, on the insistence of her teacher Professor Phadke, to study free of cost. Till today (and since the last 14 years), she continues to study under the 78 year old Kishore Phadke, ridding one of the cliché-of the generation gap. She believes that the term is simply not chronological but only attitudinal.

In 1991, when Dr Chulani gave his daughter the keys to his Clinic enabling her to have her own space, little did he realize that she needed more than that? For Varkha realized that the theoretical education did not stand her in good stead initially. She was terrified. But it was an awakening of sorts. Being exactly like her father (who she emulates), in the belief that she expects people to come to her because she is a superlative practitioner and not one who socializes to get contacts or gives cutbacks. All the years that she waited, for people to actually walk in, she busied herself in studying more and more. Finally, people learnt of her and the stories by word of mouth, the waiting paid off and success followed.

Where has she finally reached with the Albert Ellis Fellowship?
Varkha is today an Associate Fellow and Supervisor, enabling her to teach other Psychologists.

Can she please enlighten us about the differences between a Psychiatrist and Psychologist?
A Psychiatrist is a person who believes that emotional disturbances are due to chemical imbalances and corrects them with shock therapy or medication. A Psychologist is trained in the attitudinal reasons which cause emotional dysfunctions and since they are not trained in medicine it would be highly unethical for them to prescribe a drug. Dr. Varkha Chulani is a professionally trained Psycho-Therapist and believes that all neurotics need attitudinal correction and not medical treatment.

So in all honesty, do a Psychiatrist and a Psychologist work in tandem?
Well! That is the ideal situation but most Psychiatrists use psychologists only for tests, which are in most cases a massive waste of time and money. Varkha, being radical in her ways of thinking, strongly believes in getting to the treatment and does not think time should be wasted on testing, except in extreme cases. She believes that if a person is looking for solutions for day to day problems, then a person should first see a discerning Psychologist (trained to be a therapist), who in turn and if need be, would further recommend him or her to a Psychiatrist. But of course people do the exact opposite.

What were her reasons for bringing out a book for the thinking woman?
At some time or the other in her life, Varkha felt that she wished somebody could have guided and inspired her, wherein she felt that her life would have turned out a lot simpler. Being a non-conformist of sorts, she wanted to provide women with a little book that would not propound conventionally nor advocate senseless rebellion. As is noticed, in her columns, where her advice is rational, it is never so radical that it changes peoples lives overnight. Having married late, by standards set by herself and society, she has touched upon topics that remind people to check out like-minded values and ideologies, temperamental matching, sexual compatibility and the ability to communicate with each other. Of course, then rubbishing the fact that opposites attract!

What has Dr Varkha Chulani to say to all those who are looking to improve their dysfunctional relationships?
According to Varkha, many a time, we look for our failures in the outside world, very rarely admitting to ourselves that it could well be us who come in the way of our own goals. We often choose professions that our parents want, rather than what we want, and that invariably leads to disinterest and consequent dejection. Selecting a partner for love alone may be a death knell for a marriage. Because reasonable marriages require compatible temperaments.

On a simpler note Dr. Varkha Chulani abides by some home truths – “My knowledge is but a speck on the ocean, I am still learning. Education is the progressive realization of my own ignorance. Follow the Goddess of Knowledge (Saraswati) and the Goddess of Wealth (Laxmi) will follow.”