PSYCHOTHERAPY – A PURCHASE OF FRIENDSHIP?

This article isn’t about ethics. Actually, maybe it is. It was inspired by a column I read in the Sunday Times – a film personality’s breast enhancement made public by a not so ‘gentlemanly’ plastic surgeon. Yes, as medical professionals (para-professionals in my case) we are sworn to silence about our patient’s identity and close guarded secrets. But I want to take the question on ethics a little deeper than mere guarding of confidentiality. And to me this concern plagues my profession (which unfortunately, isn’t well thought of by most of the populace anyway). …

“So you see, isn’t he the problem?” asked the wife. “He needs the help not me.” I smiled because she had come with the idea that the therapist would take ‘her’ side and put her husband in his place! “You see, she is such a sweet girl, it’s the friends who bully her. Don’t you think talking to the friend and even to the school authorities will be the best way to prevent my girl from being tortured?” asked the parents angrily, believing that I should agree and sympathize with them.

These above - and other similar such - examples are the kind of difficulties that people come with to a psychotherapist. Nothing unusual, except the idea about what psychotherapy is, is at variance among laypeople. But what do we, as ‘professionals’ do, to dispel those myths? Unfortunately practically nothing! The common man thinks a psychotherapist is a friend. Someone whom he can ‘talk’ to – but the last thing therapy is, is simple ‘talk’!

A therapist is viewed as a person who will allow the person to vent – but therapeutically, ventilation hardly achieves much!

Others view us as someone who will console and give solace to our clients – comfort, particularly in trying circumstances helps. But is therapy only about providing consolation and solace?

These and plenty other misconceptions prevail amongst the common man.

The question is – do we as therapists do our job or do we become victims of commerce. Where we fear doing therapy (of course not many are qualified therapists!) for the belief that we may lose the patient to another more ‘comforting’ and reassuring therapist. Where we compromise our ‘ethics’ and do not help the girl who is being bullied to develop self-reliance and instead help her become more dependent on us, sometimes going beyond the realm of what is professionally allowed, only so that we may not ‘lose’ the client. (The assumption here is that the bullying is not bordering on physical harm). Have we therapists become victims of the money trap? Where we underplay the client’s role in his messed-up condition. Where we lay the blame on others as the cause of their problem rather than teaching the client to examine his/her contribution to the problem and to shoulder responsibility for his/her emotional difficulties. Do we at all help the client reconstruct his dysfunctional and very questionable philosophies or do we re-indorse unhealthy ideas and reiterate unscientific nonsense only so that we don’t ‘displease’ them? And are we ever in a hurry to ‘liberate’ our clients so that they stand on their feet and leave us as quickly as possible to lead lives on their own, out from regular therapy sessions?

A therapist – a philosopher, a guide. A person who is supposed to inspire and direct. But by ‘selling’ our profession – the tag of a ‘paid friend’ isn’t very far